It’s August, which means teachers and children all over the country are going back to school. It’s the end of summer vacation, which brings mixed feelings for many people. It’s a time of new beginnings, which can be very exciting, and also a little bit intimidating. For me, this August is also a time for new beginnings, but I’m not going to back to school. At least, not in the traditional sense.
Today is my last day as a Receptionist. I have spent the summer in this long-term temp position, and although in many ways, it was an answered prayer, it did very little for my soul and my art and my career to be here. It took 4 months of moving from place to place and a lot of uncertainty, but Kendall found a job that he REALLY enjoys, and we were able to sign a year-long lease on an apartment. And now, 5 months after we got to New York, we are FINALLY getting to live the life I had imagined. The life in which Kendall goes to his job as a Web Developer, and genuinely enjoys his work; the life in which I focus on acting, and spend my days learning lines, going to auditions, playing with Monroe, and going to rehearsals and performances; the life in which we live and thrive in New York City.
This summer has been good, don’t get me wrong! I’ve had the chance to see professional and semi-professional shows. I’ve gotten to have a couple of auditions that I feel good about. I’ve gotten to support my friends in their endeavors. I’ve even gotten to perform! But it’s one thing to do those things once or twice a month. It’s another thing entirely to do them every day, because it’s your career.
I have never had any qualms about having a “survival” job. I understand that it’s a necessary thing when one is first starting out. But the truth of the matter is that I did not come to New York to be a Receptionist. I came to New York to be an Actress. And it would be doing myself – not to mention my husband – a disservice if I did not actively pursue that. I became an Actress because it’s the only thing that has ever really called to me. I have had other jobs, and enjoyed them, but nothing has ever fulfilled me the way acting does, and I cannot ignore that tug on my heart any longer. I chose New York because it is such a Center for Art & Culture. I have seen works of art here that are beautiful and inspiring. And I want to contribute to that beautiful, inspiring artwork!
I’m jumping right into acting again, with a role in “Rock, Paper, Scissors,” which will be playing as part of the Arctic Group’s Fridge Fest August 31-September 10. This role is different from anything I’ve done before, and really challenging. We had our first rehearsal last night, and I admit to feeling a little out of sorts. I definitely need to work out my acting (and dance, movement, etc) muscles, and although I think this will be a really great piece to be a part of, I know it’s going to get frustrating for me. But it will also be all the more rewarding for the frustration I encounter.
I’m back to school, I guess. But it’s not school in the usual way one thinks of school. It’s the school of a new play, new director & playwright, and a new rehearsal process. It’s the school of living my life the way I’ve always envisioned it, and seeing what lessons there are to be learned there. It’s a new beginning for me; I’m excited, and a little bit intimidated, but I know it will be worth it.